Thoughtful

        As the oldest of nine children, a lot was expected of me, and the attention that I received was understandably on the low side.  I learned that by getting good grades, I made people happy and got even more “freedom”.  All the freedom would prove to be bad, as I got into a lot of junk early.

        We were a catholic family, and I wanted to do well with God, too, and be a good catholic boy (get good grades there too).  In my later teen years, I really started failing in the spiritual grades.  No one knew that it bothered me, but it really did.  A wilder lifestyle didn’t seem to bother my catholic friends, and I didn’t get it.  So, at a catholic college I threw off all organized religion. But as I did, I did feel that God was real, out there somewhere. I felt the condemnation of being a sinner lift, and I liked it.

        I had no direction to go in spiritually, so it became all about me.  I was a closet humanist, but a strong one.  I developed a bad mouth and did as I pleased.

        Twelve years later, married with a family, things weren’t working out as planned.  Old weaknesses had reappeared as the pressures of life grew stronger.  I wanted a good marriage and family, but, for my part, I was destroying the dream. I tell people that on our twelfth divorce, I knew I needed help.  I had moved out of the house to a motel near the Air Base where I was stationed.

         Suddenly many new and exciting possibilities opened up for me, opposing the idea of getting help.  At one crucial moment when I was going to take my pleasure, I was stopped. My mind just changed right in front of me!  Soon after that I was asked to Bible study, and I asked my wife to go to church.  If you knew me then, you knew that I was the last person people thought would ever go to a Bible study or set foot in a church.  I just rode with the flow.

        In the next weeks, I had asked Jesus into my life to take over the mess I had made.  As I received God’s forgiveness, I felt a permanent, lasting peace.

                                                                                                                                                            

         Since then, there have been bumps in the road, but I have been into the Bible every day now for over 33 years.  I keep learning more, loving better, and experiencing more peace as time goes by. As

I look back at my mistakes, the pain I’ve caused, and the pain I've suffered; I see it all brought me to Jesus and God, my Father.  All the pain was worth it!  I thank the Lord for His great mercy for me.

-- David Pompo